ArpitGarg's Weblog

Lying down, old and tired, I am wondering what is happening? I have faced a couple of attempts to my life, a whole lot of diseases, bouts of indigestion. My will to live and level of immune system let me sail through all these hardships all these years.

As a newborn, my father was taken away from me. A fanatic shot and it was curtains. I learned to live without him. I had an amputation right at my birth. I felt extreme pain but braved the surgery to survive. I had a troubled childhood. Before I was 15, I had couple of attempts on my life already. Such had been my lineage. A part of my head still has scars from deep cuts as reminiscence of those attacks.

I was teased regularly by people in my neighborhood. However I always helped them. I stood up for lady next door. Her husband used to beat her up daily. I said enough. Gave her enough will and support to divorce that evil man and find independent existence. Alas! That lady never was grateful. Tried to mug me a couple of times!

I found myself all chained up and locked up for a number of years by a dictator. I felt so helpless and full of resentment. One day I finally burst of anger and broke the shackles. Dictator was thrown off only to be back. Sometimes I wonder what was wrong with me. Was it my humility and good nature that they exploit?

I was labeled mad. Was subjected to mental shocks. All to get hold of me. I resented and survived again. I was attacked again and again and again. I saw bystanders just whistling and looking the other way. I witnessed them being bribed not to help me. They knew I was being tortured but they were kept placated by my tormentors.

I have grown old now. I don’t hold anything against anyone anymore. Just when I am trying to relax, having gone through a tumultuous life, I see a lot of those bystanders coming back. They say they are trying to save me. I am not sure from what.

They say they won’t let me get hurt. I am not sure from what. I ask them to go hunt my old tormentors if they are so concerned. They go silent; they say nothing.

They just keep on saying they will save me from what is happening. I am not sure what that is. I ask them to get lost. They say they won’t tolerate such intolerance.

Who am I? I am India.