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Archive for December 2012

2012: The year that wasn’t

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Topmost could have been headlines of year 2012.

1. India demolishes Eng 3-0 in the home Test Match Series. Tendulkar hit his first triple ton. Gambhir is vindicated of “see you at home” remark. BCCI decides to scrap away Tests from ICC Future Tours Program. BCCI chief Srinivasan said and I quote “All Tests played in Chennai will be Home Tests and those played elsewhere in the country will be Away Tests”.

2. World not able to witness 21st Dec 2012. Just as predicted by the great “Ronald Emmerich” in his movie 2012, owing to Earth Crust Displacement and massive Earthquakes, 90% of human civilization is wiped off. This news is telecasted from US Space Station. John Cusack is among the survivors.

3. London Olympics 2012, turned out to be a disaster, overshadowing Delhi Common Wealth Games. Kalmadi was grinning from ear to ear with, “I told ya sa” expression. Anacondas and Godzilla’s were cited around athletes’ village. Organizers are blaming it on different perceptions of security standards across the world.

4. US Presidential elections were marred by an act of shooting when a heated argument between Obama and Romney got out of hand. Both took out their M16’s and started shooting at each other and the audience. The audience were already dead of boredom so no harm done.

5. 2012 was landmark year in India as far as women safety was concerned. Women Safety Bill 2012 was passed in the parliament, which led to Women only Police stations and death penalty for rapists. Country saw ZERO rape cases and only handful of eve-teasing incidents this year.

6. AK series phone have made Nokia the market leader in Smart Phones. Foldable screens and Phones which could shoot better than AK47 have done the trick. “We don’t need to buy a gun for Mass Shootings, We buy Nokia instead”, said a consumer. Apple will be filing for Chapter 11 Bankruptcy during March next year. Samsung is in talk with Yahoo for a possible sellout.

7. United Nations Security Council intervens in the Julian Assange’s case. US/UK could face UN sanctions owing to gross human right violations. Wikileaks brings to light more facts that no one was aware of. “Sun rises in the East”, “Earth is round” and “Blueberry cheese cake is awesome”.

Among other news.
Chuck Norris was not able to kill two birds with one stone. Rajnikant was cited asleep. Superman wore underwear under his pants. Batman finally played cricket. Vivek Oberoi became superstar. Chacha Choudhary got beaten by new Ipad in chess. Manmohan Singh saw movie of his choice.

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December 31, 2012 at 1:20 pm

Change of Weather and Illness

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I was waiting for it to happen since I moved to this new city. It just wasn’t happening. It happened eventually and I am coughing like a dog now.

A sudden change in weather has always made me sick especially when it gets chilly. Extended cough/cold bout which never leave without antibiotics. My first encounter happened when I left home for college. Every time I came home for winter holidays, I fell ill. Since I started working, I have visited my native place rarely for the very same reason.

It’s like a known fact that change in climate affects people differently. Is it just the temperature that affects us or is there something more? Let’s try and find out.

As it turns out, it’s not just the weather but also the related infections and viruses (which blossom under certain climatic conditions only) that affect out body and immune system. When I was in school, the seasonal changes never gave me sickness. The reason being seasonal changes happen quite slowly and body gets time to adapt.

An interesting point I read, we tend to fell ill when tropical storm hits (atmospheric pressure decreases leading to migraines) but not much when (say) take a cold shower. Why? Coz temperature is not the prime factor affecting our health. It’s the Pandora ’s Box that comes along.

Weather changes or Wind blows or It rains, Each bring in something new. As I said certain infections and viruses thrive in certain temperatures. With wind some pollen might blow in aggravating respiratory problems. Atmospheric pressure change that ensues also affects our body as stated earlier.

As per cold weather, they say that during winters we tend to stay indoors, get less sunlight and thus germs are more likely to spread. When it is warm, we tend to go out more in open and breathe fresh air.

It’s nice to know now why exactly I have suffered all these years. Damn you weather.

Written by arpitgarg

December 30, 2012 at 9:14 pm

Posted in General/Society

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Back Office in the West

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Somewhere during the early ‘90s, everyone realized the immense potential of outsourcing industry. With telecom/data rates on the decline, we saw call centre, KPO, BPO, captive units grow rapidly, changing the lives of a whole generation and realizing the dreams of an entire country.

With jobs, money, prosperity; a slow cultural impregnation has also taken place. We never realized when 31st Dec became the be all and end all of cyclical culmination of celebration. We never realized when Diwali holidays became a rarity and Christmas holidays became a norm. Ladoo/Barfi gave way for Cakes; Jalebis became Donuts; Lassi became too heavy to handle and Coffee light.

All this happened in India coz the jobs coming in were from countries like US, UK etc. I wonder what would have happened if the jobs would have originated from India and Indian culture would have influenced countries around the world.

The light footprint of the world would have been dazzling, the Diwali Night. The next day of Holi, people around the world would have gone schools/colleges/office having tinges of pink/green color on their faces.

A certain person in NY would have woken to Aloo Paratha with butter for breakfast. Haldiram’s would be in place of MacD/Pizza Huts all around the globe. John would have taken his family for a Kachori/Jalebi outing and VadaPao would have been blamed for Indianisation of the west.

In a Hollywood movie Tom Cruise would have a father settled in riches of Mumbai. He would have taken the son to US to get him marry a white girl. A son hell bent on marrying some Priya from Chandigarh. How the Hollywood would have sung, “Come, it’s time to go back”. No Pankaj Udaas, but a certain Snoop Dog would have sung, “A letter from my country” and the American Diaspora would have wept the Nehru Centre.

Mr. Abe would be Shree Abe, or let’s go a step ahead, would have changed his name to Abhimanyu, just to fit in. Roger would have walked into a back office in the heart of London in Kurta Pajama and HR would have coached in how to wear a Pajama with perfect crease. There would have been Chai/Lassi/Thandai machines in the breakouts with a few Charpai thrown in to relax.

The VadaPao/Chola Bhatura joints in NY/London would be decorated with diya’s on Diwali’s eve and people would be discussing, Ram and Sita and the history. People in Italy would protest forceful conversion to Hinduism funded by RSS and would deliberate enacting anti-conversion laws.

Restaurants would be designed so as people would be seated on the floor and waiters serving them food. World economy would be centered in Mumbai with New Delhi bombing countries in South America for their religious extremism and their getting close to develop Nuclear weapon.

I am already ROFL. The potential to explore on this topic is immense but I would excuse myself now lest I think some more and go berserk.

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December 26, 2012 at 2:39 pm

The immortality of Maggi

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The immortality of Maggi comes to fore time and again. Just when we forget all about the existence, it rises from the ashes to become part of life once again.

Maggi has been a phenomenon which has touched everyone alike. It transcends through age and gender. Ask a child, a college student, a working bachelor. A lot of imitators have sprung up over the time but none been able to come even near.

What is it about Maggi then? The flavor for once; the mouth watering Maggi tastemaker. It’s heaven. Next is the companionship in thick and thin. It unites among diversity. It’s home away from home. When I went to college, Maggi never let me feel away. When I am travelling to diverse places, I have my staple with me.

Of late I drifted away from it and got into bad habit of eating so called healthy food. I can never apologize enough to you My Dear. But you never deserted me. WhenI was hungry that night, you came to my rescue. You let me sleep peacefully.

To be true, however hard I try to find reasons why I like Maggi, I can’t find many. Maybe that’s the magic, that’s the secret. It just is immortal. It just is Meri Maggi. Cause and Effect can take a hike for once.

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December 19, 2012 at 6:54 pm

Life of Richard Parker

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Some are meant to make you laugh, some are meant to make you think, some are meant to make you fear, some are meant  to make you thrill, but once a while there comes the one to inspire. I am talking about the movie Life of Pi.

The movie was about not losing hope, to hang in there, to labor through the rough. The movie is narrated from the point of view of the protagonist Pi Patel. What about the perspective of our very own Richard Parker?

It’s a story of hope for Richard Parker too. Stranded at ocean amidst the shipwreck, how he braved the circumstances and lived on. He had to swim to the safety of the boat. He had to compromise on his ethic and eat the dead (tigers don’t eat the dead, they eat their prey), to survive. Richard learned about the need to change. Against the instinct to attack and kill Pi, he eventually learnt to become subservient. Pi was keeping him alive by providing with fish and fresh rain water after all.

However he had been kept captive by humans. He knew given a chance, Pi and its species would not hesitate to enslave him again for its pleasure. Pi owed its life to Richard as much as Richard owed his life to Pi. It was a give and take. Richard learnt the importance of freedom at ocean. When the boat reached Mexico, Richard jumped off and escaped as soon as he could. There was a good chance that he would have been captured or killed by humans had he stayed.

It was just smart of him to leave. For him it was the process to gain his freedom. It was the process to gain his life back after captivation by humans and having faced death at sea. That he didn’t kill Pi was his gratitude enough to the race that reveled in capturing and enslaving him. It was more to ask to turn back to Pi and say a good bye.

His good bye lied in gifting Pi his life. I guess it was too much for us humans to understand.

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December 17, 2012 at 3:00 pm

The Loneliness

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I am finally settled in my apartment in the new city. Packers have moved, taps are working and food is cooking. Last two weeks went by at such a frentic pace, I didn’t have any time to stop and think. Now that I have, the realization strikes slowly. I am all alone.

Loneliness is a very wierd thing. Sometimes you have no one around and still you won’t feel it. Sometimes there are lots of people around and you would still feel lonely. Mysterious!

Coming back to situation at hand, I have come to realize the importance of family. With time it’s not as easy to make new friends. Work becomes priority which does not give you time enough to socialize. It’s not that you can’t, it’s just that the chances and the instances and the zeal decreases.

Here is where family comes in. If you shift to a new place with your family, I guess it’s not as strange a feeling. You don’t have to form social/friends circle on urgent basis just to pass the evenings. You don’t have to go shoppings alone. You don’t feel that pang of strandedness.

Moving to a new city, to a new job is teaching me new lessons daily. I think next time I make my move, I’ll try and have my family with me.

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December 11, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Herogiri Mellowed

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I feel like I am getting old. People around me call it maturity. Whatever it be, the aggression is taming down. There one good thing though. Adjusting to this new behavioral trait might be strange but it is nowhere uncomfortable.

Let me give a bit of the background to explain it better. I have been a kind of person who you can call moody, rude and even insane. I have rubbed people the wrong way in a fit of mood. But somehow with time, I find myself becoming passive. Things don’t bother me the way they used to. Prioritisation.

Just last day, a senior person in my firm called me and asked me to close the top button of my shirt. The thing is I feel kind of suffocated with the top button in my shirt tied. However instead of explaining my point of view and going into an argument, I simply closed it and smiled back.

I have never liked being dictated to. In fact such an incident would have insesnsed me, but I feel nothing but calm. You know an year back too someone asked the same thing, I leaned forward and asked the person to go ahead and close it himself. Kinda rude but that’s how I was.

Anyways, as of today, I just don’t like arguing with people. It’s a grand waste of time. I have better things to do. On my way to salvation!

Written by arpitgarg

December 7, 2012 at 11:56 am

Posted in Personal

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