Archive for February 2015
Tax Slabs Unchanged: A welcome change
Finance Minister has kept tax slabs unchanged this budget 2015-16. Disagreeing with the popular notion, I welcome this. I’ll tell you why.
It goes back to the root question, “What do we expect of our Govt.?” For me personally, I expect my life to get better. Public amenities to get better, Traffic situation to get better, Better Roads, Better Air, Affordable Housing. I expect to retire early and save enough for leisure. For me none of these wishes are granted by easing of Tax-Slabs. A few thousand rupees extra in my pocket seems nothing but a bribe.
Yes BRIBE. It feels like Govt. throwing bones to a dog. Something like, “We won’t do anything to give you a better quality of life, but here, I am throwing few thousand bucks to you. Lap it up and shut up. Vote for me the next time too”. For me it’s nothing better than a MNREGS like subsidy. I am totally against it.
Hence I commend FM. Thanks for not throwing bones to me and bribing me. Hope you utilize the tax I pay to give me what I want in the long run. Let future FM’s too hear this loud and clear. Don’t try and buy my integrity and my vote. Create sustained resources. Give me the nation of my dreams.
सच है
दिल में उठा है दर्द सा कुछ,
रह रह कर के आता है,
सह सह कर के जीता हूँ,
हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।
भुन्नैटा सा यह जीवन क्यों,
सपने धरे सब, ज्यों के त्यों,
ख्वाइश तोड़-२ के सीता हूँ,
हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।
चहुँओर मेरे है हलचल सी,
पगला सा हूँ मैं देख रहा,
लो हाथ रख गीता पे कहूँ,
हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।
आँखें भर आती जब-तब,
मेरे हाथ भी कापें जाते हैं,
बोझ ये कब तक मैं सहूँ,
हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।
अपना जिसको माना था,
दिल था जिसके नाम किया,
समेटता मैं वही फजीता हूँ,
हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।
सब फुर्ती फुर्र हुई मेरी,
चाहते हैं भागूं खूब तेज,
इंसान हूँ, न मैं चीता हूँ,
हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।
वाद-विवाद न करना अब,
ठान लिया बस ठान लिया,
उलझन सारी अब सुलझा दूँ,
हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।।
The Apathy of General Class
This weekend I was travelling by train. I had a slight argument with train attendant. According to him, “Bedsheets don’t belong to railways, they belong to me”. I didn’t completely understand why he said so; have raised this query with railways, which I know would go unanswered.
Since rail budget is round the corner, I would like to touch upon a topic that has been neglected year after year. The General Class compartment. According to a news report around 2.3cr people travel by trains daily. Out of them around 1.5cr travel by General Class. Tectonic 65%, around the same as total voter percentage last General Elections.
Whilst train fares have been increased time and again, the situation of General Class Compartment has not improved. Wooden seats, People fighting a war to get inside. All of you would have seen long lines, manned by policemen, waiting to get inside the train. Those lines are to get inside the General Compartment.
Whenever you feel things are not going well in your life, imagine the apathy of people in General Compartment, you will stop complaining. 65% figure does not mirror Govt.’s priorities. I see hardly 3-4 General Compartments whenever I travel.
I would have expected 65% Compartments to be of General Class in trains, Alas! It’s not the case. Well, Democracy works differently in theory and in practice.
My Savior: Maharaja of Mysore
“Mysore finally has a new Royal Head”. Poof! I was near death in recent months, as to the future of Mysore. Now that we have heir apparent, I can put my worries to rest.
How shameless is our society that still celebrates such people. Bloodline who leeched the last drop off poor people. Bloodline who dined with British. Bloodline who slept in vast palaces, when people all around were dying of hunger. More shameful is to see Govt. representatives lining up to attend such ceremonies. Anyways from a nation which reveled in calling Nehru ‘RajaSahib’, what more could be expected.
In a nation that queues up outside foreign embassies for Visa; Where a NRI groom is a jackpot; Where Income Tax raid is taken as a status symbol rather than a shame; Where Damadji, Jijaji rule the roost; Where handful of political and industrial families have corrupted the system so beyond repair; Where Govt. change but farmer suicide continues; Where hunger forces common man to learn to live without self-respect, this doesn’t come as a surprise.
I would have loved to see such ceremonies being banned. If not banned then such people being publicly shamed and shunned. But no, we revel in royalty, pledge our allegiance to it and also feel good about it.
However when I see chaiwaala, mufferwaala as PM and CM, I feel all is not lost. My hope in the nation’s resilience stays alive.
Devil and the Deep Sea: Land Ordinance
Bachelors crave to get married; Married crave for Bachelorhood. Children want to be ice-cream salesman; Ice-cream salesman wants to be child again. People in India want to go onsite; Onsite Indians long to come back. To cut the analogy short, perspectives change when we cross over. This sums up the Indian Govt’s predicament. Tables seem to have turned.
While Delhi defeat was just a hindrance, the Land Acquisition ordinance is turning out to be real thorn in the flesh. I have no doubt that PM believes changes to the bill are necessary for long term growth, the problem is how to explain it to voters.
As per general opinion, newspapers, TV/Nukkad debates, Govt. is coming out as a villain in this whole episode. And who knows better than Modi that it is all about perceptions. It’s a fact that farmers of this country voted en masse for Modi during general elections (also during Haryana and Maharashtra). In a country like India which is in election mode round the year any misstep will lose you an election somewhere or the other.
Given the track record of successive Govt.’s on land acquisition, farmers are right in being sceptical. I read that even the people who lost their land when Bhakra Nangal Dam was build, haven’t been compensated fully till date. I agree that land is required to set up industry, which in turn provides job. But to do so by alienating people is not a way forward.
Instead of simply doing away with certain provisions of social impact study, approaching court and making the kisaan of India feel uncomfortable, what Govt. should have done is to incorporate such provisions which make farmers sell their land happily. Raising x2/x4 to x10 could be such a thing.
When a farmer sells his land for 100/- and an year later some industrialist re-sells the same land for 1,00,000/-, farmer has the right to feel cheated. Steps should be taken so that farmers earn dividend on the appreciation of the land price too. 25% share to the original owner of appreciation, if land is sold/sub-let by the acquiring party could be another such provision.
It’s too hard to predict how next few days will unravel, but one thing is sure, it is going to be mighty hard for BJP to convince farmers to vote for the party. At least for near future.
Mother Teresa: The Controversy
A recent remark by RSS chief on Mother Teresa and her missionary work has caused huge uproar across the country. Since Mother Teresa is generally considered an epitome of charity, the statement was bound to cause the ripples.
I decided to do some reading into whether she was involved in conversion or not. What was the real motive of her service? However I left my reading midway. A more emotive issue struck me. Why do people convert?
As I understand any invasion by a ruler of different faith brings with itself forced/induced conversions. It happened with Mughals and British alike with different degrees.
The real reason that came across to me was caste system in India. When we do not allow people of certain caste to enter temples, use common wells and subject them to any and all humiliation in the book, they tend to lose faith in the God they believe in. A ready dose of a different religion and a different God rapidly moves in to fill the void. By the time Hindu leaders (Entirely Upper Caste), understood this, the phenomenon had already spread.
At the same time, let’s not run away from the fact that primary mission of Christian Missionaries is to spread their religion. They find a ready market in the downtrodden and neglected sections of society. It’s a different matter altogether that nothing changes for such poor people in reality. While one religion makes them untouchables, the other religion neglects them once the aim to convert is achieved.
My request to Hindu Leaders would be to make sure caste system is eradicated and anyone who still practices it is thrown out of the religion. And my request to Christian Missionaries would be to stop carrying the White Men’s Burden and work for the downtrodden without asking them to convert.
Kaun Hai Yeh Vikaas?
Since 9 months of Modi Govt are over, people of India have been doing rounds of Birth Registration offices across India to look if Vikaas has been born or not. Okay Bad Joke.
A lot of things doing round on social media and people are seriously looking for Vikas. Kaun Hai Yeh Vikaas?
I received a message on my Whatsapp, “Modi Sarkar ke 9 Maheene Poore, Kejriwal CM Ho gaya. Kahin Kejriwal hi toh Vikaas Nahin?”. When Kiran Bedi said, “My name is Vikaas Bedi”. People got confused. But then she lost and that debate was nipped in the bud.
Top detectives of India took it into their hands to find out who Vikaas is. Below are the excerpts from when they met.
ACP Pradyumn: Chupp ke baitha hai yeh Vikaas. Kuch toh Gadbad hai Daya. Kuch toh Gadbad hai. Aakhir chupp ke kyon baitha hai yeh Vikaas? Kya zaroorat padi isko chupp ke baithne ki? Har darwaja tod ke dekhna padega (Finger swirling).
Karamchand: Shut up Kitty. Ahem Pradyumn. Yeh bhi koi sawaal hua. Swaal toh yeh hai, ki kya sahi mein yeh Vikaas hai ya behroopiya hai? Is Vikaas ke mukhaute ke peeche Kaun hai? Kitty…Kitty.
Byomkesh Bakshi: Mujhe toh lagta hai ki Koi Vikaas-Bikaas tha hi nahin. Ajit, yahi asal baat hai. Par phir bhi sab Vikaas ka naam baar baar le rahe hain. Is rahasya ki jad tak jaane ke liye humein gawahon se ek baar phir baar karni padegi.
All three of them went to talk to the witnesses.
Tumne dekha hai Vikaas ko?
Witness 1: Nahin Maalik. Humein toh nahin dekha. Suna bahut tha. Gaye bhi they haspataal hum toh. Doctor sahib ko bhi nahin pata hua ki nahin.
Witness 2: Kal ekdum aisa laga ki Vikaas chilla raha hai door. Bahut dhoondha. Bas awaaj hi sunayi di. Kaunoo pishaach laage.
Enter The Muffler Man.
Mufflerman: Arey ab bhi nahin samjhe. Yeh Vikaas Chunavi Jumla tha ji. Chunavi Jumla.
Akbar-Birbal jodi: He…He.
Popat
Disclaimer: All names and places are real. Nothing has been altered as the target is to make fun of people involved.
How to define Popat? Well its a situation when someone has a bad experience which seems hillarious to others. We call it iska toh popat ho gaya.
Let me relate an incident. A couple of my friends were going to a collegaues wedding. They had a train to cath from mumbai. One of them came from Pune. They were all set to catch train from Mumbai Central.
Their train was at 11:45 in the night and they discussed plans to gulp a beer or two at Marine drive before proceeding to Central which is 10 mins away from there.
The fun was their train was from LTT which is quite far even for late night roads. Had they reached Central and would come to know of the goofup, we could say ki Popat ho gaya.
Hope this makes the meaning and usage clear. Poor chaps would be left licking their wounds, while we audience would be discussing and writing blogs and making fun at their expense.
Unfortunately fate intervened and a third party (me) who shared the wassapp group on which this discussion was going on pointed out the obvious. So popat hone se bach gaya.
Office Office
Beings of different breed,
With no cast, color and creed,
Each having his own history,
Such is my office story.
Leg pulling and making fun,
Speak whatever, given a spun,
Sarcasm in all its glory,
Such is my office story.
One is stud by the books,
And another just for the looks,
A marriage, yes yes, notory,
Such is my office story.
There is a property fanatic,
Few interested in market share,
On surface all hunky dory,
Such is my office story.
One fellow is persona satisfied,
Another sits with tongue tied,
Output less, more inventory,
Such is my office story.
One brings food for everyone,
There is one, hair getting none,
A finger pointed, laugh & merry,
Such is my office story.
One guy feels always in dumps,
Near to him, never fails to pump,
Failing to realize, is temporary,
Such is my office story.
More same than they different,
Neither enemies, nor best friend,
All riding same breakless lorry.
Such is my office story.
Murud Beach: Unchartered Heaven
I have had a chance to spend a couple of days at Murud Beach, near Mumbai. It was a weekend well spent.
It is around 4.5 hrs from Mumbai by road. Though there is a break journey ferry-bus route too. We reached around 11 in the morning and checked in ‘The Nest Bamboo House’. The resort is on the beach and has cottages only. The place made an instant impression on me and I was all in. We had breakfast, lunch, dinner on the beach itself and it was quite good.
Comparison with Goa would be unfair. Murud is a unique experience in itself. No hullabaloo, no rush. Virgin Beaches to explore. We eat Veg and there were ample options available. The resort I mentioned is one of the best place available on the beach.
There are lots and lots of coconut trees in the resort compound (which is just elevated extension of the beach) and ample hammocks to lie down and relax. Thats exactly what I did. Took a novel and forgot the world.
Unique thing is that water recedes as the day progresses. By late afternoon, more and more beach becomes visible and water recedes good 100mts. Unique nature of sand, makes horse riding on the beach feasible. You will find paragliding, four wheeled bikes, carts, horse ride, water activities also on the beach.
It is still not fully commercialized and gives you feel of Goa of the old. Highly recommended if you want to relax with family.
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