Posts Tagged ‘gavaskar’
Dhoni Under ICC Scanner
Dhoni seems to be in the middle of yet another controversy. After the “Glove Web” fiasco and “Two and a half (2.5) Jam” hiccup, Dhoni has irated ICC once again. According to our sources, Dhoni is under investigation from ICC for the potential theft of cricketing material.
An ICC internal memo, a copy of which is present with us states, “Mr. Mahendra Singh Dhoni, captain Indian cricket team is hereby charged under Section 25.2 for stealing stumps from the field. Stumps are ICC property; hence he is in breach of ICC code of conduct.”
Sources inside ICC has told us, “Dhoni targets the middle stump which has camera and microphone attached to it. This has resulted in huge losses to our broadcasters”.
It might be recalled, Dhoni was censured by ICC for causing loss of cricket balls by hitting huge sixes out of the ground. Dhoni has curbed his aggression since, to stay away from any controversy.
ICC says Dhoni is not only involved in this gross theft but also encourages the same by his team mates. It’s has become a bloody team game.
Insiders have told us, “One who steals stumps in a match is guaranteed in playing XI, in the next.”
“Why else do you think Munaf and Yuvraj are still in the team?”
“Why else do you think Bhajji is so close to Dhoni?”
Theft of every stump is celebrated heavily. “Let’s concentrate one stump at a time. Records will be made themselves. Soon we will have 1000 stumps in our armory”, Dhoni is supposed to have boasted once.
Dhoni was enraged. “It’s not just me; every cricketer keeps stumps as a memento”. “If you win today, you lay claim to the stumps. This is my mantra to motivate the team. Media and ICC can say anything; I have support of my team.
Opposition players are aware of this. In fact some very much appreciate him. “The knack that Dhoni has for grabbing stumps is uncanny. No surprise that he is a wicketkeeper”.
BCCI has been enraged with these reports. In their press brief they contested, “Our crickets are extremely rich owing to IPL. Why would they steal if they can afford to bribe grounds men. ICC should stop being pain in the back.”
Post the media reports that it was Steve Bucknor who first reported Indian team for stealing, proof of Bucknor himself being involved with the racket has emerged. “He was unhappy with the profit sharing and hence he bitched about Indian players”, said a report.
Legendary Indian opener, Sunil Gavaskar has come out strongly in support of Indian players. He presented his own dossier on international cricketers who have been involved in such thefts from a long time. “Why is ICC silent on these people? Just because Dhoni is an Asian, it does not give ICC the right to level such serious charges”.
It seems highly unlikely that ICC will act against Indian captain and annoy the cash cow BCCI. ICC has infact designed theft proof stumps (pic below). Given its dual purpose, ICC has also tied up with clean-the-nation program run by Sharad Pawar.
Cricket and my Grandpa
A: “Sachin plays for himself. I better, he stops playing”
B: “Hey! What are you saying? He is a great match winner”
A: “But don’t you think he is old enough to be pensioned?”
B: “He is still scoring tons. Isn’t he?”
A: “He is past his prime”
B: “Yeah with average of 50 during last year! I think your mind is sub-prime”
A: “Go to hell”
B: “You go to hell”
…
…
A: “Coffee?”
B: “Ok.”
This is what a cricket discussion in India sounds like. A general discussion suddenly gets focused on Sachin and from no where rival gangs sprout up. Pro and anti Sachin sentiments start flaring. Swear words and curses are thrown all around. Then there is truce. This cycle repeats itself day after day.
My earliest encounters with cricket date back to my Grandfather. He was a great cricket enthusiast and even greater Sachin basher. I reckon he lost a bet or two coz of Sachin and he remained pissed off with him forever. “Out ho gaya. Yeh bhi nahin socha ki mausa ji ke paise lage hain”, I remember him mumbling when Sachin got out stumped while chasing against NZ. Above statement is a classical example of raw humor of the oldies. It relates the player who got out to my grandmothers family. So the loss is blamed squarely on the player and my poor old grandmother. I tell you, these oldies can be quite cruel sometimes. The trick lies in not being over smart with them.
He was not a fan of what we call the purest form, the Gavaskar style of cricket. He adored Windies team of 70-80’s. “Lala, kaalon ka aakhiri khiladi bhi aata tha toh chakka maarata hua aata tha” (Even their last player started off with a six). The only Indian player of old about whom I heard anything positive from him was Kris Srikkanth. “Jab who ballebaaji karta tha toh bazaar soone ho jaate the” (Streets got deserted when he came on to bat). For all those who say that oldies preferred Tests to ODIs here’s the last salvo. “Are yeh paanch din ka khel humse nahin dekha jaata. Ghanton baithe raho, ek bhi chowka chakka nahin lagta” (Not a single boundary is hit for hours).
From the current era Jayasurya and Afridi (Afriki for him) were his favorites. Indian team was the most unreliable team as far as he was concerned. “Are inka koi bharosa nahin. Lanka ke khilaaf 200 kuch banana the, saala aaya raam gaya raam shuru ho gaya, aur sab ke sab 78 run pe simat gaye. Mausaji ka nuksaan ho gaya”.
I think T20 would have been the best format for him. Sadly it was during his last years that T20 got popular. It would have been wonderful to watch IPL with him. However he took off even before season one.
Regardless of what people are saying nowadays, I can never lose interest in and ODI game. I have grown up with it. It’s like a ritual to me. And of course it has memories of my grandpa. I remember one of his favorite quotes. Whenever Azhar played well, he used to say, “Captaan hai koi naayi ka launda thode hi hai” (He is not a commoner, he is the captain after all). So it goes for the ODIs.
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