ArpitGarg's Weblog

An opinion of the world around me

Archive for 2008

Six things that annoy me most in Bigg Boss

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  1. The irritating laugh of Rahul Mahajan. It sounds as if he is trying to pull off a gargling Santa.
  2. Payal’s camera consciousness. Her constant reminders that one should not make a fool of oneself on National Television. God it’s almost a cliché, just 3 weeks down the line.
  3. How Elina’s accent kinda changes, you (k)now when she switches from Hindi to English.
  4. Sambhanvna trying to act decent sometimes, when we all including her know that’s not the case.
  5. Another one of Payal’s clichés, “I am not some Bai” and “I am not from such low background”.
  6. Shilpa trying too hard to act to be a host but failing miserably each Friday.

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September 10, 2008 at 12:06 pm

Tring…Tring…are you an idiot?

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I received this call last week.

Caller: Hello, is this Hardhik Garg? not clear whether it was Hardhik or Karthik.
Me: May, I know who this is?
Caller: Hi, I am Shyamsundar. I am a pass out of IIT Guwahati. You are also from Guwahati naa Hardhik. I got your name and number from Satish Mittal. You might know him. He was from your batch.
Me: Arre, my name is Arpit. Yes, I know Satish.
Caller: Sorry Arpit. Actually I just talked to Satish over the phone. He was busy with a presentation. So couldn’t hear him clearly. By the way I am from ‘99 ECE batch.
Me: ’99 passout batch?
Caller: No ’99 joining batch. I passed out in ’03.
Me: Oh!
Caller: Yes, you and Satish would have joined a year later.
Me: Yes, exactly.
Caller: You might know Bora Sir, Gogoi Sir.
Me: Yes, I knew Bora Sir. Not remember about Gogoi Sir.
Caller: Well, I am in Mumbai right now. I came here with regard to my visa for Australia. I was travelling in local train when my wallet got lost.
Me: Oh God!
Caller: Yes and with it went all my cash, credit card, debit card.
Me: So you are out of cash right now. Guessing that’s why he had called.
Caller: Yes. That pretty much the case. I called Satish for help. He was busy in office. I know how it is. I myself was at Microsoft for over a year. So didn’t disturb him much. He gave me your number and asked me to contact you for help.
Me: Oh Ok
Caller: So where exactly are you in Mumbai?
Me: I am at my office in Powai area.
Caller: Oh! Near IITB. I have been there once during college.
Me: Ok. So where are you? How do you need help?
Caller: Sorry yaar. I guess I am not disturbing you.
Me: No problem at all.
Caller: I have just one debit card left with me. Fortunately, it was in the bag and not the wallet. It’s an old HDFC account. I haven’t used it recently, so it doesn’t have any balance right now.
Me: Yes listening.
Caller: Can you please deposit some money into this account. Would it be a problem?
Me: No. not at all. What’s your full name? Shaymsundar…
Caller: It’s S. Shaymsundar. I am from south.
Me: Oh. Ok. Yes go on.
Caller: My account number is XXXX. I will return your money as soon as I reach home.
Me: Oh. Ok. I haven’t received such calls before. Was not sure whether it was a crank call. How to be sure? Just then it struck to me. So which hostel were you in?
Caller: Oh! I didn’t live in hostel. My dad was … he told some Govt job, that I forgot in Guwahati. I used to live with my family in the city.
Me: Ok. You might know Ravi then. He was from your batch only. (Just made some name up to check).
Caller: No I don’t remember any Ravi. Which stream was he in?
Me: I don’t know exactly. Thought you might know. Well so bhaiyya (trying not to sound too questioning), who was the director at your time.
Caller: Oh! He was someone called Mohanty. You might not know him. (Caught you!!!)
Me: Yes, yes. So what is the sum you need?
Caller: Let’s see. I have to take a flight from here to Banglore. I would need 2-2.5K.
sounding hesitant and feeling sorry to disturb me I hope I am not troubling you any bit?
Me: Arre naa.
Caller: Is there any HDFC branch near you? You may check online for that.
Me: I think there is one branch nearby.
Caller: Oh. Thank God! So how long would it take?
Me: It should take me around 20 min to reach there.
Caller: So are you leaving right now?
Me: Don’t worry. I will leave immediately.
Caller: Thanks yaar. I would repay it on reaching Bangalore. I would like to meet you and Satish both when I return from Sydney. You guys are really helpful.
Me: Oh! No problem at all. After all you are our senior. This is the least we could do.
Caller: So. I’ll call you in half an hour.
Me: Yes, sure.

I called Satish. He whispered over the phone. He was in a presentation. I asked him does he know any Shyamsundar and had he given him my number. According to him, this guy called him some 15-20 minutes ago. Was not sure where he got his cell number. From orkut, perhaps. Forwarded the call to me, as he himself is busy. “Plz verify before doing anything”, were his words.

Well. I did leave immediately not for the Bank but for lunch. I went over the chinks in the story with my friends, to weigh the odds.

Chink 1: He was not able to tell the name of the hostel and made up some excuse. Plausible though, I must say.

Chink 2: There was no director by the name of Mohanty. GB Sir were there in our time and if he had passed in 2003, as he said he did, he should have known his name.

Chink 3: I would have understood if he needed some cash. But he needed money transferred into his account. Given internet (core) banking these days, he could as well have called his friends and family. They would have deposited money anywhere in India into his account.

Chink 4: Similar argument goes for the flight ticket to Bangalore. Any of his known one could have booked the ticket online. He just needed the PNR. Instead he went all pains to ask someone he didn’t knew even remotely.

Chink 5: The best part of it. The call was from a local landline number. I tried to call back but it was engaged. Probably a STD booth. So the guy didn’t have a cell number.

He called back and I told him that there is no HDFC bank in my vicinity. Better he call his friends and family to get a ticked booked online. Sorry that I could not help him. Looking forward to meeting him when he is back from Sydney.

Well, I still have his account number. (Based on real events)

Written by arpitgarg

September 9, 2008 at 1:23 pm

Was Sambhavna really abused on Bigg Boss????

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Was it just me or did something controversial really took place between Raja and Sambhavna. Day 18 of Bigg Boss, aired on 4th Sep ’08 saw Sambhavna crying in the confession room. According to her Raja was not a nice person. She said, “I went to him crying, missing Rakhi and I never knew that “this” would happen. He is not a good person at all.”

What was the “this” that she was talking about? When Bigg Boss asked her that if something “nasty has taken place in the house due to eviction fear”, was there a sexual abuse undertone? Is it possible that being given the power to nominate someone, Raja tried to get nasty with Sambhavna, who don’t want to loose, looking to earn some money. At least I felt so. Sambhavna pleaded Bigg Boss not to reprimand Raja regarding this; coz then she would really be thrown out off the house.

So has Sambhavna been abused? We all know Sambhavna pleaded each and every house mate not to nominate her coz she needed some money to pay her dues (either Sanjay or Rakhi revealed it after being evicted). So is she bearing all abuse to earn few bucks? If yes then it’s nothing short of casting couch. Can this be allowed to happen or should some regulatory authority take notice and act.

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September 5, 2008 at 7:10 am

Is life really this amusing?

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Whenever my friends used to tell some interesting incident of their life, I was always like, “O! God Why have you never done anything so cool in my life?” Really people, this has been one of my greatest regrets, I have nothing interesting to tell. I never understood why and how people have so much interesting to tell? Let me jot down a few of such things which my friends told me, that were quiet fun and unique.

  • One of my friend never forgets what his dream was last night. He can explain you his dream in such detailed interesting fashion that you feel like “Well dreams are such fun. Why do I never remember them?”
  • Many of my friends have interesting tales about the holidays they spent in their ancestral village. I always feel like a “Joey”, whenever some one is telling such a story. The tales of old havelis, bonfires, gang fights. I could never believe that they do happen outside movies. But so do people say!
  • One of my friend stopped visiting his ancestral village, coz his parents were worried that his aunt (who lives in village) would feed him poison coz she didn’t have a son. I shook my head in utter disbelief. He said his parents were damn worried.
  • Once when I was sitting in a friends room at college. A colleague came rushing in asking us to google out the number of Chapra (Bihar) S.P, coz their has been an attack on his family and he wanted to instruct the SP to take care of the situation till he reaches the home. (Not that I want such a thing to happen to me, but still…something close to that would do)
  • A couple of my friends used to play with used contraceptives and fill them up with water and swing them like balloons. (I still wonder, was I so dumb that it never occurred to me?)
  • One of my friend used to play with snakes and bats since childhood. I was sure that he was faking, when one day, he caught a flying bat with a towel and put it in a jar in front of us. We were like stunned. Then he captured a couple more.
  • One of my friend had very interesting characters in his neighborhood. One was a guy who used to rub under his arm and then smell his palm. Other was a shopkeeper who used to fight with his own children as to who would drink the sip of pepsi that the last customer have left in the bottle. Another one was a African guy, who went mad when people called him “Kaalu”.
  • One of my friends had a personal stalker, now would you not long to have one for yourself. How unfair God.
  • One of my friends’ family tried to get him engaged when he was in college. The girl’s (with whom my friend was to get engaed) sister who was also married to my friends’s cousin was putting emotional pressure on him (my friend was in first year of bachelors at that time). The need for such a hurry was that the girl was 5’10 or 5’11 something and her family knew that finding well educated suitable groom would be hell of a problem and my friend is 6’2. He had to do something fishy to get out of it. I mean wouldn’t it have been interesting, at least a tale to tell, if it would have happened to me. But shucks, I am not 6’2.
  • All of my friends have had atleast one such childhood fight (fight bole to ekdum dishum dishum waali), that they still cherish to remember, but not me. God has been so cruel to me that I never as much slapped someone in my school as far as I remember. No broken tooth, no bruised leg, no black eye, no swollen forehead. Being fat also didn’t help. As they say, “Fat people are very jovial and don’t fight”. Neither can they flight nor can they chase you down.

It’s not that my life has been totally void. It’s not the case. I have had my share of fun, my share of smiles, my share of cries, my share of naughtiness, and my share of tries. But the incidents have been nowhere close to the ones cited above. When my friends used to tell me their stories, they didn’t seem true to me; so much so that I used to think that they are faking most of it. But over the years I have learnt that maybe not having any such amusing incidents in my life at all, makes my life all together differently amusing.

Written by arpitgarg

September 4, 2008 at 11:06 am

Happiness Divided

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Last weekend, a discussion initiated out of boredom, led to an interesting thought. Let me put forward a number of assumptions before getting into the heart and soul of it.

Assumption 1: There exists some heavenly power, call it God if you want to.

Assumption 2: The heavenly powers created the universe and in that sense our earth and subsequently human beings. And after forming us it went into the self imposed sleep mode.

Assumption 3: Unlike Oil, Water, Thorium and Diamonds; Happiness was divided equally all over the earth. i.e. Happiness per square meter = Total happiness/Total surface area of earth.

Given the assumptions, a square meter of land should have as much amount of happiness as a square meter of ocean surface. Now the total surface area of earth is about 500 million square km, with around 150 of it land and rest 350 being water.

World population today is around 6.5 billion. This ideally gives 0.02 square km area per person. Let the happiness on earth be 1 HN per square km (equally divided). HN being happiness quotient (say). It gives 0.02 HN per person. If population density is taken into consideration we are left with a drastic difference in happiness among different continents. Given the hypothesis. Just to give you some idea:

  • Asia:       0.012 HN
  • Africa:    0.031 HN
  • Europe:   0.014 HN
  • Oceania: 0.270 HN

So Down under people have more Happiness and Asia comes the last. Is it really so? Well I don’t know if happiness can be measured someday, can be quantified or not. There have been a lot of tries though. One such try that I was reading, was http://www.financialjesus.com/2008/05/27/top-10-happiest-countries/ . They consider certain parameters and list top ten happiest countries. Here are the top 10 happiest countries in decreasing order, according to the given survey.

******************HN       Rank******************

  1. Denmark         0.008      155
  2. Switzerland     0.006      6
  3. Austria            0.010      44
  4. Iceland            0.333      9
  5. Finland           0.064       41
  6. Australia         0.385      7
  7. Sweden           0.05        49
  8. Canada           0.313      12
  9. Guatemala      0.009      152
  10. Luxembourg   0.006      179

Going by HN in various countries I couldn’t find a direct relation to population density. This leaves us no where and our hypothesis seems fishy.

God might have some other distribution method for sure. Maybe equally per person, but then all of us would have been equally happy, which is not the case. However hard I try, I don’t get close to the answer. Perhaps, “God has his own designs”.

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August 1, 2008 at 7:48 am

Sai speaks: The pillar is shaking

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“What you are going to witness today is an out and out miracle. It has happened for the first time in the history of the universe. It is earth shattering and totally phenomenal. You can catch this live and exclusive only on your most trusted news channel!”

Last few weeks, I have had the opportunity to spend a considerable time in front of the idiot box, as they call it. At college I usually follow news online, but at home its 24×7 news channels for me. Truly speaking, more often than not they turn out to be a great time pass. Last few weeks we saw the Noida murder case and the Gujjar agitation occupying the prime-time. Barring a few incidences, most of it, I felt was an example of some good journalism, if not brilliant.

Amidst all this I felt the emergence of a parallel journalism, owing to the cut-throat competition among the ever increasing number of news channels. This journalism is not shying away from running close to being yellow. One such news item caught my attention lately.

It was the most celebrated and most debated news report of “Speaking Sai Baba”. I was all the more interested in the news item as my family worships Sai Baba and I personally too, am a great fan of his preaching. A video was on air which depicted the speaking Sai. A prime time news report followed. The reporter of a leading news channel took calls, asked for reactions and discussed this miracle.

I felt a bit confused. I could easily make out, what was being aired was nothing but an animation clip, that too an amateurish effort. Well, one may argue that I am a computer engineer from IIT and it would have been a bit easy for me to distinguish between an animation and a video recording. True, but believe me, it would have taken no Bill Gates, to check the validity of the said video.

My point is, was the channel not wrong, in not getting it tested by an expert before catering it to the viewers. Leave aside the sanctity of God that they put on hold, what sort of journalism says that any unverified news report can be telecasted? Has the thirst to go on air first and bring exclusive news grown so much that the ethics of journalism are being put to ransom.

But maybe, I am missing the point here. The said news was not for all and sundry. It was a very clever drama enacted for a large chunk of people like us who believe in Sai. We people are nothing but a viewer ship base. Our feelings and sentiments are nothing but a TRP.

Should someone not ask the channel in question, what was the revenue earned during the period the news was on air, by how much were the ad rates hiked during that particular news program and what was the jump in overall viewer ship ratings of the channel. But I know, the channel couldn’t care less and as I have said already media sell what sells.

One might argue that media is not solely to be blamed. Viewers should be responsible enough and not just blindly follow everything and anything that’s put on air. True, but then what’s the difference between an entertainment channel and news channel. Today our nation believes what’s on the news. And why not, news channels are seen today as a forum for the common man, a potent weapon against the system. This makes the need for news channels being responsible, all the more important.

Perhaps what’s there to realize is that such acts add little to the strength of the fourth pillar.

Written by arpitgarg

June 19, 2008 at 8:58 pm

Me and My bulging bellorism

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Friends, I have had it again. Why does it repeat itself over and over? It remains all well and under control when I am at college but no sooner than I am at home, it bulges out. Just like a slow poison, it starts bulging gently and before you could notice it, it’s already there full grown.

For those who didn’t get “it”, I am talking about my bulging belly. Let me get one thing very clear, I am a heavy built. You can call me from a “khata peeta khandaan”. At college I try to keep my belly under control, more often than not, successfully. But at home during holidays, I give up eventually; however hard I try.

This time round too, before coming to home, I planned out my stay very carefully. It included the usual: jogging, gym, swimming, dancing and yes a bundle of novels to finish. “This time I can and I will make the difference”, was the war cry.

Six weeks down the line, after cansters of ghee, lots of junk food, and none of the things which I took oath for, my belly is back and raring to go. Belly button is back to invisible mode, pushed between the two belly’s up against each other.

There is no need to worry though. Two weeks are still there. I have decided on a harder regime. No junk food, lots of jogging, lots of gym, lots of swimming, lots of dancing and a bigger bundle of novels. And it’s my promise to one and all, two weeks down the line I will win this fight against my belly. But during this outright war, my mom is a potential detractor, preparing one delicacy after another. If I have to win this war, I have to get her on board and make her a strong ally against my bulging bellorism.

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June 18, 2008 at 7:27 pm

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Book v/s Author

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Whenever I read a book which talks about life and philosophy, tries to preach and influence the readers, I am not readily able to connect with it. It is important for me to first know about the author, to know that the writing is from the heart and experience of the author. Not just some set of arbitrarily penned down fundas.

When I read fountainhead neither was I able to accept it nor respect it. I simply couldn’t believe that some human being (Ayn Rand) could be so cruel as to design, follow and propagate such a philosophy in deed. It seemed to me a past time after thought of a wasted mind. It was only after I read about Ayn Rand that I was able to understand the mindset of the author and could relate to her writings. Born in socialist Russia, her book and her thoughts were a classic example of the rebellion, an anti-thesis straight from the Hegelian dialectic.

When recently I saw her 50 year old televised interview and could feel the conviction in her voice, in her eyes, was I able to respect her thoughts and philosophy even further. For me to accept and to respect are two different phenomenons. Maybe I am not able to accept it but given her belief in what she wrote, I do understand her writings better.

Same was the case with Paulo Coelho. When I finished reading the Alchemist, to me it was a very simplistic short story with a bit about goal and path thrown in. However I was able to relate to it more than the fountainhead at the first go, but respect was missing here too. I still didn’t know about the purity of the origin of the thoughts I was reading.

I just finished “Paulo Coelho-Confessions of a Pilgrim”, a book of conversation b/w Juan Arias and Coelho himself. This book brought me face to face with Coelho. His disturbed childhood, his hippie days, drug influence, abduction by paramilitary and spiritual awakening on the trip to Santiago. It was as if I could feel the man himself in all his writings. His constant search was now clearer to me through all his books.

One may be inclined to ask, what’s new about it? Whenever we hear a speech or read a column, if we know the author well, does it not help us to understand him better? I never said that there is anything new, but recently I have observed a trend, a mad rush for the search of the ultimate question. Hence, a mad race for clinging on to any and every preacher, round the corner. We should be circumspect, not just fall for anyone.

Opposite to the contrary, I believe, “Judge the author before being engulfed by the preaching” So is the case with a book, if its philosophical, I ought to understand where and how this philosophy was born or else it’s a junk to me.

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May 18, 2008 at 8:47 am

The Verdict: What it means

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They say the fight is over. Yet after two years of struggle nobody knows who the winner is? Perhaps the time will have to decide. Hon’ble Supreme Court of India have upheld 27% reservation for OBC’s in elite education institutes. Our HRD minister has called it an historic judgment, a verdict which has vindicated him. Opposing student unions have called on to revive the struggle. Different people: Different views. I would like to put to pen a couple of points which I deem quite intriguing.

  • Financial Burden on the Government

Moily committee report suggested increasing the seats in higher education institutes by 54%. This was to keep the number of general category seats intact. A huge financial burden was predicted. Lately we have seen an unprecedented hiking of the fees by IIM’s up to 250% with IIT’s soon to follow suite up to 100%. The increase in revenue generated from the tuition fees from general category students seems to compensate for the said financial burden for now (I don’t have the exact figures). The only financial burden that seems probable is by the setting up of new IITs, IIMs, which sure is an investment rather than an outright expenditure.

  • Keeping away the creamy layer

This term often intrigued me a bit. Time and again, I have tried to grasp the length and breadth of it. What I concur is that introducing this clause in the verdict seems a bit of a compromise between the Govt. and the SC. Contrary to the popular notion; it might not help in increasing the level of students being admitted via quota. Cutoffs will decrease further. No doubt about that. According to the belief among the intelligentsia it would at least help replacing the privileged duffers by the underprivileged strugglers.

I have used “duffers” as a general notion. It’s not that they have got no brains. It’s just that the urge to succeed seems lacking, when everything is catered to. Maybe the ones who are underprivileged would try a bit more than their privileged counterparts who were lacking a reason to.

  • Additive Reservation

You would find me an advocate of the reservation (not based on caste), as the affirmative action. What I strictly abhor is an additive one. Once propelled via reservation, why a subject be allowed to reap it time and again? Doing away with it would further help to distribute the resources equally among all needful. Most important of it all, it might motivate them enough to work hard at their first and only chance. The motivation might even help them outperform their general category colleagues, paving a path for doing away with the reservation in the long term.

  • Shape of the future struggle?

I remember representing IITG at a Youth for Equality meet during summer ’06 in Banglore (when govt. was about to present OBC reservation bill in monsoon session). I had an opportunity to interact with some of the socially ignited minds from AIIMS, JNU and other IIT’s. I chatted with personalities such as Mr. Khera and Mr. Agarwal (Supreme Court lawyer for the resistance), if I recollect well.

The picture I got was, most of them baring a few agreed to my viewpoint. All they were against was a caste based reservation and the creamy layer. In fact most of the budding leaders were quite sad that they were being labeled anti-reservationists. They said, “Its not anti-reservation pal, it’s a struggle against caste based reservation. Why isn’t it being called so?” Well this is media. It sell what sells.

Now that the creamy layer is out of the way, I don’t feel next phase of struggle would be that extreme (if not incensed by opposition, which seems highly unlikely).

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April 16, 2008 at 4:53 pm

Dreaming again 3: Friends For Sale

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We had an unexpected break this Thursday. The lecture got cancelled (quite an anomaly!). Medical problem, I guess. It’s one hell of a problem in this side of the world, more so, if you are an outsider. I myself took time adjusting to the local weather, had to be medicated a couple of times. This takes me back a couple of years, when I snubbed the CMO, IITG. God! What a prig I was.

“…how to compute the probability…given the…we try to uncover the hidden part of the model…”

The nodding goes on as usual. Lata is sitting right in front of me or as they say I just came and sat right on the back of her. I tell you, I am losing charm in her overtime; her being married hasn’t helped much either. I think it’s finally over.

The Friends For Sale (FFS) application on Facebook is really making me crazy. When I meet someone new, I often find myself guessing how much he is worth.

“…we try to use optimality criterion to solve this problem as best as possible…”

Here comes champu and jj. Pucchu is not here yet. Today champu and I went to Prof. Ketaki. She is the instructor for our humanities course. It was about our presentation that is due.

“…model parameter is called the training sequence…”

Oops! Sir tried to peak into my writing.

I had one of the most satisfying talks with her. She sensed a bit of political sense in me from my mid-sem answer scripts. She talked about how not to lose sense of what we believe in and how we feel about it. “The whole world will try and take it away from you…but it’s so divine that it must be protected”. Her words are still ringing in my ears.

“…let N be the size of the code book. So we get the seq of vectors out of M diff. indexes”

Why is the attendance so low today? I can hardly count 15.

Where was I? Yes, champu. He is the sort of guy who keeps the group going. “Never let the fun die out”. Champu tried to peek into my diary. I gave him the finger.

“…to segment each of the word training sequence into stages and study the prob. Of the spectral vectors.”

God! I feel sleepy. It’s been 2 days now, I guess.

JJ and I finished working on a term paper recently. It dealt with DNA cryptography, such a novel idea. We have worked really hard on it. Hope it materializes.

It’s the purple suit and a brown hair clip today. Can’t I leave it already?

“…once the w-HMM’s recognition of an uttered unknown word is done using a solution to problem.. each word is modeled based upon the given test observation sequence…”

The FFS is engulfing like hell. I was just napping about it. God it’s great. I heard a remark about me sitting in this particular seat. I got the hint.

Champu sneezed, kido yawned while ld enjoyed the usual nap. FFS once again crossed my thoughts. Don’t call me crazy. If you think you don’t get addicted that easily, try it once.

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April 1, 2008 at 11:42 am