Mother Teresa: The Controversy
A recent remark by RSS chief on Mother Teresa and her missionary work has caused huge uproar across the country. Since Mother Teresa is generally considered an epitome of charity, the statement was bound to cause the ripples.
I decided to do some reading into whether she was involved in conversion or not. What was the real motive of her service? However I left my reading midway. A more emotive issue struck me. Why do people convert?
As I understand any invasion by a ruler of different faith brings with itself forced/induced conversions. It happened with Mughals and British alike with different degrees.
The real reason that came across to me was caste system in India. When we do not allow people of certain caste to enter temples, use common wells and subject them to any and all humiliation in the book, they tend to lose faith in the God they believe in. A ready dose of a different religion and a different God rapidly moves in to fill the void. By the time Hindu leaders (Entirely Upper Caste), understood this, the phenomenon had already spread.
At the same time, let’s not run away from the fact that primary mission of Christian Missionaries is to spread their religion. They find a ready market in the downtrodden and neglected sections of society. It’s a different matter altogether that nothing changes for such poor people in reality. While one religion makes them untouchables, the other religion neglects them once the aim to convert is achieved.
My request to Hindu Leaders would be to make sure caste system is eradicated and anyone who still practices it is thrown out of the religion. And my request to Christian Missionaries would be to stop carrying the White Men’s Burden and work for the downtrodden without asking them to convert.
Kaun Hai Yeh Vikaas?
Since 9 months of Modi Govt are over, people of India have been doing rounds of Birth Registration offices across India to look if Vikaas has been born or not. Okay Bad Joke.
A lot of things doing round on social media and people are seriously looking for Vikas. Kaun Hai Yeh Vikaas?
I received a message on my Whatsapp, “Modi Sarkar ke 9 Maheene Poore, Kejriwal CM Ho gaya. Kahin Kejriwal hi toh Vikaas Nahin?”. When Kiran Bedi said, “My name is Vikaas Bedi”. People got confused. But then she lost and that debate was nipped in the bud.
Top detectives of India took it into their hands to find out who Vikaas is. Below are the excerpts from when they met.
ACP Pradyumn: Chupp ke baitha hai yeh Vikaas. Kuch toh Gadbad hai Daya. Kuch toh Gadbad hai. Aakhir chupp ke kyon baitha hai yeh Vikaas? Kya zaroorat padi isko chupp ke baithne ki? Har darwaja tod ke dekhna padega (Finger swirling).
Karamchand: Shut up Kitty. Ahem Pradyumn. Yeh bhi koi sawaal hua. Swaal toh yeh hai, ki kya sahi mein yeh Vikaas hai ya behroopiya hai? Is Vikaas ke mukhaute ke peeche Kaun hai? Kitty…Kitty.
Byomkesh Bakshi: Mujhe toh lagta hai ki Koi Vikaas-Bikaas tha hi nahin. Ajit, yahi asal baat hai. Par phir bhi sab Vikaas ka naam baar baar le rahe hain. Is rahasya ki jad tak jaane ke liye humein gawahon se ek baar phir baar karni padegi.
All three of them went to talk to the witnesses.
Tumne dekha hai Vikaas ko?
Witness 1: Nahin Maalik. Humein toh nahin dekha. Suna bahut tha. Gaye bhi they haspataal hum toh. Doctor sahib ko bhi nahin pata hua ki nahin.
Witness 2: Kal ekdum aisa laga ki Vikaas chilla raha hai door. Bahut dhoondha. Bas awaaj hi sunayi di. Kaunoo pishaach laage.
Enter The Muffler Man.
Mufflerman: Arey ab bhi nahin samjhe. Yeh Vikaas Chunavi Jumla tha ji. Chunavi Jumla.
Akbar-Birbal jodi: He…He.
Popat
Disclaimer: All names and places are real. Nothing has been altered as the target is to make fun of people involved.
How to define Popat? Well its a situation when someone has a bad experience which seems hillarious to others. We call it iska toh popat ho gaya.
Let me relate an incident. A couple of my friends were going to a collegaues wedding. They had a train to cath from mumbai. One of them came from Pune. They were all set to catch train from Mumbai Central.
Their train was at 11:45 in the night and they discussed plans to gulp a beer or two at Marine drive before proceeding to Central which is 10 mins away from there.
The fun was their train was from LTT which is quite far even for late night roads. Had they reached Central and would come to know of the goofup, we could say ki Popat ho gaya.
Hope this makes the meaning and usage clear. Poor chaps would be left licking their wounds, while we audience would be discussing and writing blogs and making fun at their expense.
Unfortunately fate intervened and a third party (me) who shared the wassapp group on which this discussion was going on pointed out the obvious. So popat hone se bach gaya.
Office Office
Beings of different breed,
With no cast, color and creed,
Each having his own history,
Such is my office story.
Leg pulling and making fun,
Speak whatever, given a spun,
Sarcasm in all its glory,
Such is my office story.
One is stud by the books,
And another just for the looks,
A marriage, yes yes, notory,
Such is my office story.
There is a property fanatic,
Few interested in market share,
On surface all hunky dory,
Such is my office story.
One fellow is persona satisfied,
Another sits with tongue tied,
Output less, more inventory,
Such is my office story.
One brings food for everyone,
There is one, hair getting none,
A finger pointed, laugh & merry,
Such is my office story.
One guy feels always in dumps,
Near to him, never fails to pump,
Failing to realize, is temporary,
Such is my office story.
More same than they different,
Neither enemies, nor best friend,
All riding same breakless lorry.
Such is my office story.
Murud Beach: Unchartered Heaven
I have had a chance to spend a couple of days at Murud Beach, near Mumbai. It was a weekend well spent.
It is around 4.5 hrs from Mumbai by road. Though there is a break journey ferry-bus route too. We reached around 11 in the morning and checked in ‘The Nest Bamboo House’. The resort is on the beach and has cottages only. The place made an instant impression on me and I was all in. We had breakfast, lunch, dinner on the beach itself and it was quite good.
Comparison with Goa would be unfair. Murud is a unique experience in itself. No hullabaloo, no rush. Virgin Beaches to explore. We eat Veg and there were ample options available. The resort I mentioned is one of the best place available on the beach.
There are lots and lots of coconut trees in the resort compound (which is just elevated extension of the beach) and ample hammocks to lie down and relax. Thats exactly what I did. Took a novel and forgot the world.
Unique thing is that water recedes as the day progresses. By late afternoon, more and more beach becomes visible and water recedes good 100mts. Unique nature of sand, makes horse riding on the beach feasible. You will find paragliding, four wheeled bikes, carts, horse ride, water activities also on the beach.
It is still not fully commercialized and gives you feel of Goa of the old. Highly recommended if you want to relax with family.
An Open Letter to Narendra Modi
Sir,
I write this letter from the deepest of respect that I have for you and for the PM of India.
I am one of the millions who used to lap up all your speeches. Often hopping news channels one by one to hear the same speech again and again and again. Fighting hard with your detractors and trying to convince them of you. And I enjoyed it thoroughly.
Today I am a bit cofused as to the viability and authenticity of those speeches and whether those hours went down the drain for me. I wonder if I should have put all that time to some other use. Sir, I kindof feel swindled. Here’s Why.
1. Naturally Corrupt Party: When you raised the pitch, we echoed the sentiment. Everyone knows what NCP has done (not) for farmers and what is the root cause of farmer suicides. When you chided Chacha-Bhatija, we all smiled. Ghadi ke 10 se 10 and what not. Now you share stage with the same Naturally Corrupt and praise him. Your party president invites the same Naturally Corrupt to his son’s lavish wedding reception. I am befuddled as were those speeches a facade or what?
2. Don’t know how much black money: Over black money I understand it can’t be brought back over night. And I don’t expect that. During your speeches you cited figures of how much black money is abroad. But after the uproar post your UPA-3 inaction and Supreme Court reprimand, you went on Mann ki Baat and backtracked. You said you don’t know how much black money is out there. I again feel those hours I should have given to better work. Your chief says it was just chunavi-jumla and you say nothing to disregard him. How can I listen to another speech now?
3. Damadji: You went hammer and tong against Damadji. Of how he got undue benefits. Of how is name is at airport list of VIP’s. Of how the whole machinery is at his foot. We saw a ray of hope. Now Damadji will be behind bars. 9 months on and Damadji is still out. His name still on the list. I wonder was that also chunavi-jumla or your partymen not let you put him behind bars? As you might not be but a lot of people from your party and their kith and kin are no less privileged than Damadji and might face retribution from Congress Govt in distant future. Why I listened to those speeches still aches me.
4. Sabka Saath Sabka Vikaas: I doted on you when you said that. No appeasement, No arrogance. But you don’t say a word against your MP’s who blatantly say otherwise. The regressive and devisive odour is in the air. We can smell it, why can’t you? Was Sabka was just part of speech and nothing else? Was I a fool to have tuned in to those?
You might have had your reasons, one can be to become PM. It’s your prerogative. But what should I do now, who stands cheated. I implore you to keep my faith intact. Be the PM that mirror your speeches. Till then I am afraid I will switch off to any more of it.
Heartfully Sorry,
Arpit Garg
Mind Games
I met a friend of mine today after a very long time. However we hit it off like yesterday. Now this friend is a person with extraordinarily high IQ. He is a genius but like with all of them he has a problem. He tends to micro analyse things.
He don’t know when to let go of things. He will keep thinking about incidents in his life from a factual perspective. You can’t find a fault in his analysis per say. But what he fails to understand is, we don’t need to do it always. If we have a quarrel with our brother, we should hug it off the next day. But his brain works differently. He will analyse the quarrel to find the root cause and in turn will never talk to his brother.
If you talk to him, you will be mighty impressed by his reasonings. They are theoretical and hence very difficult to be punctured. He will let himself suffer because his brain tells him he is right.
Such mindgames that he plays with himself, hurts no one but him. I hope with time he realizes that being happy is more important than the concept of right or wrong. Hope he loses with himself in these games of mind.
My Valentine
With red rose in a hand,
I ask thee on one knee,
Raising a toast of wine,
Will you be my Valentine?
Perfumes so odour sweet,
Pray O heavenly beauty say,
I am at service of thine,
Will you be my Valentine?
Ground that treaded thee,
I collect as a souvenir,
Sweep it with broom so fine,
Will you be my Valentine?
I look at you fixated,
From mornings bright,
Till night strucks nine,
Will you be my Valentine?
Will be there for you always,
Won’t buzz off now and then,
Persistent like flu of swine,
Will you be my Valentine?
Hope to grow old with you,
Wrinkle for a wrinkle come,
And look like a fruit of pine,
Will you be my Valentine?
Himalayas high, Forest deep,
Searched love me everywhere,
You answer to prayer of mine,
Will you be my Valentine?
Why BJP lost Delhi?
More than the AAP victory, I consider this BJP’s loss. Delhi was with Modi and yet somehow it was lost. What happened?
1. 7 month > 1.5 month: BJP kept harping on 49 days AAP Govt but did nothing for Delhi in 7 months they ruled indirectly via Centre.
2. LG the puppet: You would remember BJP people raising hue and cry on AAP for raising fingers on LG. LG is constitutional post. Let LG call us first etc. This used to be the Congress line. People of Delhi saw that and decided to teach them a lesson.
3. Black money: Lethargy over black money. People elected BJP not to form SIT and gloat, they did so that black money is brought back. No out of the box acts by Govt to bring back black money did it in.
4. Communal Tension: Unlike in Lok Sabha election, Hindu vote didn’t get polarized. Attacks on churches, communal statements by BJP leaders and silence of Modi was too much to handle for people.
5. Acche Din: The promise was of instant relief and people wanted just that. Nothing changed on the ground and Modi was not able to communicate to people that he required more time.
6. Arrogance: I wrote recently that arrogance shown by BJP spokespersons was just like the one shown by Congress people in the past. BJP took people for granted in their arrogance.
7. Bad mouthing: Bad mouthing a good man like Kejriwal didn’t help. People were angry with Kejri for running away. But they still considered him a good person. Bad mouthing him like Modi did in Maha, Haryana and Jharkhand was not accepted by people.
8. UPA 3: BJP has started to turn into UPA 3. Crony capitalism continues. Loot of country continues. Kejriwal was able to bring home this point.
9. Bedi: Though not a major reason. Opportunist Bedi drove away whatever voters were left with BJP.
Haaoo Haaoo
Whenever my wife argue with me, I dodge the situation by saying, ‘Haaoo Haaoo’ (How How in UP dialect). “You don’t do a single chore”; Haaoo Haaoo. “You forgot my B’day”; Haaoo Haaoo. “You don’t love me anymore”; Haaoo Haaoo.
It is sort of asking her to elaborate on the reasons. But real motive is to turn frown into a smile. A lot of tense situations can be diffused by such simple gestures. No escalations. All of us know this very well but choose to act otherwise. We fight argument with counter-argument. Insinutaion with insinuation. It does nothing but makes matters worse.
Munnabhai movie depicts a nice way of Jaadoo ki Jhappi (magical hug). Nothing better to diffuse a situation.
Never escalate a situtation, specially not at home. If you don’t agree with me, I would just say, Haaoo Haaoo.
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