ArpitGarg's Weblog

An opinion of the world around me

Posts Tagged ‘beer

Top 5 Tips for Girls to Gain Weight

with 18 comments

Of late size zero has become a phenomenon. Humanity has never lost so much weight in history as today. What girls tend to forget is that guys like curves. Slim figure is welcome but zero is not. Most thin girls have a phobia that by gaining weight they will look fat. First of all they should shed this inhibition. A little bit of chubbiness adds to the beauty anytime.

For all those single girls whom I have been able to brainwash into gaining weight by my above appeal, here are certain easy tips. Follow them and you will thrive and men will hover around like a beehive.

Tip No 1 – Find a Guy who lives alone
It’s quite easy to find a guy in metro cities who is working there and lives away from family alone. Such guys tend to eat out most of the times rather than cooking. You will start eating out too. Eating out regularly will add that missing kilos in no time.

Tip No 2 – Hit the bed long
Getting lots of sleep is one of the easiest ways to gain weight. A minimum of 8 hours sleep is necessary. Anything above is a bonus. This way weight gain would be like a dream come true.

Tip No 3 – Beer it
Over the centuries ‘Beer belly’ has been one of the most controversial phrase. But it works and how. Drink beer regularly for a month and you wouldn’t believe how lovely you look with those plum cheeks.

Tip No 4 – Don’t flunk the junk
Go junkie! Those Big Macs, fries, pizzas, pastas are a sure shot path towards glory. Never be scared of the food. Eat as much and as junk as you can.

Tip No 5 – Get married
Easiest of them all! Scientists have been wondering over the years as to why Indian women gain weight so quickly as soon as they get married. Regardless of the reason behind, it works. The only flip side is that you are married now.

Bonus Tip: Call me!

Written by arpitgarg

July 21, 2011 at 8:39 pm

Top 5 Modern Means to Ease Tension

with 2 comments

1. Divorce
A two faced dragon. Post the concept of divorce, couples has been eased out of tension of living unhappily together. It gives a shot at starting life afresh and get out of the lifelong agony.
 
2. AC
In hot and humid conditions, mind is not able to reach its optimum production level. Air Conditioning has solved this altogether. Even in extreme conditions, we can choose to live at whatever temperature we want. How the AC soothes our mind and rejuvenates us in those summers.
 
3. Chocolate Sundae
There is nothing like a hot fudge, whipped cream Chocolate Sundae that sooth our nerves. After a tiring day, a sundae relieves us like nothing else. Modern life has its goodies to offer.
 
4. Bungee Jumping
Not for the faint hearted. The thrill remains us for life. Try it once and you will never be scared in life. It adds thrill to a boring life and eases our mind.
 
5. Combat Video Games
Beating the hell out of someone is an age old solution to ease tension. We can beat, kill, and destroy anyone and anything in this virtual world. Believe you me the thrill is the same. Play a “Beat you Boss” at the end of a tiring day and it will outperform a glass of Beer.
 
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