Archive for the ‘Personal’ Category
Strange Day Indeed
Sun was shining too bright,
Silence seemed too tight,
Fluffy clouds looked too light,
It was a strange day indeed.
Something seemed amiss, true,
This long, grass has never grew,
Ships were still, and no crew,
It was a strange day indeed.
The pace of wind horrified,
An abandoned child cried,
Couldn’t find a human, tried,
It was a strange day indeed.
Lot of feelings, inside,
More of seek and less of hide,
Lion and deer drinking side by side,
It was a strange day indeed.
I was walking on the cloud,
Did lot of things, not proud,
Tried shouting, couldn’t be loud,
It was a strange day indeed.
Everywhere I saw just one face,
More curious than Button, my case,
Time to slow down, what rat race,
It was a strange day indeed.
Just say it
It’s been around 10-12 years, but the importance of what my Dad told me that day, presents itself time and again.
Our family was having dinner together. Out of nowhere Dad said, “Today the food is great”. I found the food no different. It was the same. I was perplexed. Dad understood what I was thinking and told me, “It’s important once in a while to compliment your partner even if you don’t mean it. She puts in a lot of effort everyday for this usual food. A single word of praise goes a long way to ease the tiredness of the daily routine. It’s refreshing and a lovely thing”.
The Man was indeed right. My Mom passed a blushing smile and the tension of hard work was gone. It was replaced by satisfaction. Had my Dad not said anything to Mom, it would have been fine. But just fine and nothing else.
To feel is not enough. What’s important is to express those feelings time and again. With our monotonous routine, we fail to keep track of these things and life starts drifting. To keep the fun alive, timely intervention is needed.
When you love someone, be it your parents, your siblings, your friends, your partner, it’s necessary to remind them verbally of that love time and again. They know that you love them, but little reassurance is always nice. Next time you meet your Mom, tell her that you love her. You would be amazed to see the smile on her face.
Courtesy: A Lovely Cat
Gibberishing
There are times when we wake up to that recurring nightmare. We hope it to be the last one. But alas! It comes back. Similar are the bad habits. However hard we try, they keep hanging onto us.
One such habit that I have tried to shed, with little success is ‘talking too much’. I have dealt with short temper, emotional outburst, butt-booze successfully over the years. But I have no reasonable explanation for my tongue.
I have faced losses at academics, work and personal life alike due to my gibberish. Mind needs time to think, channelize thoughts and come out with something reasonable. But when one talks a lot, rubbish comes out, as mind has no time for processing.
People stop giving importance to what you have to say, considering the huge volumes. Over time you become like background music. You are an irritant, hindering the foreground processes.
Your relationships too take a hitting. You lock in most time for what you have to say and less time for listening to the other person. One needs a partner one could talk to. No one needs to be with a J L Baird, one way relay.
One speaks so as to express the existence of oneself, but eventually ends up being non-existent. Irony!
If you are also the one who talks a lot, now is the time to rein in. I won’t list ‘n’ points towards improvement as I am still struggling with it. If you have any advice, do let me know. It’s time to give our tongue taste of its own medicine.
ऐसा नहीं है
ऐसा नहीं था कि मुझे कुछ गम था,
पर जीवन में लगता कुछ कम था|
पत्र तो था पर मंजिल थी लापता,
अगले मोड़ पे टकराइगी, क्या था पता||
ऐसा नहीं था कि मैं कोई विश्वामित्र था,
पर तपस्या थी हकीकत, न चल-चित्र था|
इन्द्र की बारिश, ये दिल सह न सका,
जब तन मन तपाने बनी तू मेनका|
ऐसा नहीं था कि कभी मस्ती नहीं थी,
पर अपनी कोई अलग हस्ती नहीं थी|
दौड़ा गयी तू सिरहन, मिली नयी राह,
कट रहा था जीवन, आई नयी चाह|
ऐसा नहीं था कि कोई पगला था मैं,
हाँ समझदारी में थोडा कंगला था मैं|
‘हड़बड़ी कबतक, आदतें सुधारो’, तूने ज्ञान दिया,
ज्यादा नहीं गर थोड़ा तो समझदार किया|
ऐसा नहीं था कि दिल ये पत्थर था,
पर धड़कने को नहीं ये तत्पर था|
मौत के जैसे आई औ जिंदगी दे गयी,
दिल को धड़का, मेरी सांसें ले गयी|
ऐसा नहीं है तू मुझे भाती नहीं,
या सुबह शाम तेरी याद आती नहीं|
सहे हैं दुःख तूने, और दे नहीं सकता,
असमंजस है मेरा, वक़्त ले नहीं सकता|
Shootout in the Rain
First full-fledged down pour of the season and Mumbai was left reeling. My weekend plans stood canceled as they involved a bit of travelling. I decided to cool my heels at home instead.
Late afternoon, a news came trickling in about shootout of a veteran journalist. Given the violent times we live in, I would not have given the story, a second hearing. But few keywords caught my attention. Apparently the shootout took place near to my house; on the road that I take daily. Another of such tragedies that I have come up close. The last being when an air hostess leaped off the building I lived in.
These incidents do leave a sad feeling. However as cold as it may sound, they don’t affect us anymore as far as personal security is concerned. I didn’t leave the building after the said suicide. I will take the same road tomorrow. It becomes just news. And then the calls, “Heard a shootout happened where you live. Were you there? Did you see anything?” and other such queries.
In another hour or so I had almost forgotten what had happened. I was just waiting for the rains to subside to get on with the evening. But they never did. I decided to go for a stroll to the park nearby. No sooner had I stepped out of my building did I see dozens of media satellite vans lined up. I wondered why. Then I remembered the shootout. My building is adjacent to the police station and whole media was there to cover the story.
I abandoned the idea of the walk and came back to the apartment. It was time for my evening snacks.
Secret Talks
Personal Secret is described as something that is known to the person alone and not to any of his acquaintances. Lie is defined as an intentional false statement. They both are related as one leads to another.
Everyone keep secrets. To keep them hidden, they lie. There are various reasons behind. Most common are shame, loss of money, property, love desertion, to brag etc.
I have come across people who kept some weird secrets, told wonderful lies. Some of substance, some just for fun.
1. Kyunki…shhh
A college mate leads the pack. You know how it’s common to deride the ‘Saas-Bahu’ soaps. Well this friend of mine just loved them. The situation was precarious; he couldn’t dare to them watch openly, lest he became butt of all jokes. So he used to download and watch them all alone quietly. As fate would have it, he shared the folder by mistake across the network and the skeletons came tumbling out.
2. Categorically denied
Our society has been divided into class and caste and so is the college admission process. However in some a stigma of being a category student creeps in. Treatment meted out to them could be a reason. There was a guy in our batch, who lied about the same. I won’t go further into the reasons, as the discussion is complex. But when it came out in the open, it left everyone wondering.
3. Had a boyfriend
Most common of them all! Don’t tell about having boyfriend/girlfriend and keep yourself in the market. It’s okay for causal flirting but when done to take advantage, it becomes tasteless. A girl fooled around with a friend to get him to do the academic work allotted to her, while keeping the existence of her boyfriend hidden. Here’s a fact: ‘Guys only help Single Girls’. She knew this well. I can’t say that my friend really cared or so he said later on.
4. From Upstate
We often find people hiding their birth place. Across Europe, I have found people from Pakistan calling them Indians. In Mumbai, few people from UP, Bihar fake their origin to be Delhi. Sometimes out of being scared, sometimes otherwise. A friend of mine introduced himself in the first year as a Delhite. It was only in the final year that we came to know he was from Ghaziabad. He tried to justify by citing NCR. Well reasons can be aplenty. We do still poke him for the same.
5. Opener
A senior at college related to me a funny story. During their first year, a guy told everyone that he was the highest JEE ranked student of their batch. He was called Kholu (common term for rank opener). He enjoyed the limelight for a semester, at the end of which people came to know the truth. They started calling him nakli kholu. Why he lied is still a secret as he maintained his innocence all through.
6. Open the Closet
A serious issue with our society as far as homo-sexuality goes. I have known at least two people who kept it a secret, for obvious reasons though. Hopefully, in future the social stigma attached o it will wither away and people would not have to hide in the closet.
7. Uncle Sam
A first year student who was a localitie was being ragged. He dared the seniors, “My uncle is in ULFA, stay away from me or else don’t tell me I didn’t warn you”. Needless to say, he got away. The fun was, everyone knew he was lying but no one dared to call otherwise.
How to ease the tension?
Oxford dictionary describes tension to be a mental or emotional strain. To cope with it, we all do some weird things. Some eat a lot. Some starve themselves. Some want to be left alone. Some like to party. Some smoke. Some drink. Some sleep. Some fall prey to insomnia. Guess some things are aberrant to cause and effect.
As for me, I stuff myself with food when tense. I am no medical expert but my guess is that more oxygen is needed to digest the excess food gobbled up. This extra demand of oxygen must for sure be met by diverting some blood flow from my darn brain to the belly. This might be shutting of some brain activity and helping me overcome tense thoughts. I would opt for a dead brain any day, but that’s me!
When food can’t be ordered say at the dead of the night, I opt for the next best option. Start typing whatever gibberish comes to my mind. It’s around 1:30 in the night now. All junk food is finished and I don’t have anything else but to write. Funny I can’t pinpoint the reason why I am tense. This further adds to uneasiness.
Anxiety is the exactly what I have right now. In fact for the last couple of weeks my mind has not been at peace exactly. How would I love the day when I be Joey and my brain will read blank…blank…blank…blank…blank. Void of all thoughts; bereft of any tension, if at all momentary. Alas! It’s not to be.
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