Archive for the ‘General/Society’ Category
The Loneliness
I am finally settled in my apartment in the new city. Packers have moved, taps are working and food is cooking. Last two weeks went by at such a frentic pace, I didn’t have any time to stop and think. Now that I have, the realization strikes slowly. I am all alone.
Loneliness is a very wierd thing. Sometimes you have no one around and still you won’t feel it. Sometimes there are lots of people around and you would still feel lonely. Mysterious!
Coming back to situation at hand, I have come to realize the importance of family. With time it’s not as easy to make new friends. Work becomes priority which does not give you time enough to socialize. It’s not that you can’t, it’s just that the chances and the instances and the zeal decreases.
Here is where family comes in. If you shift to a new place with your family, I guess it’s not as strange a feeling. You don’t have to form social/friends circle on urgent basis just to pass the evenings. You don’t have to go shoppings alone. You don’t feel that pang of strandedness.
Moving to a new city, to a new job is teaching me new lessons daily. I think next time I make my move, I’ll try and have my family with me.
Not tough but not easy
After four and half long years in Mumbai, I decided to move to Pune. I have been with the same firm, same colleagues, same house and same city for long. Moving has been far from easy. Emotionally. Everything that we have lived for sometime becomes part of a habit. The craving is immense.
By comparision leaving home for college and leaving college for job was pretty easy. But moving to a new city now has not been. It made me wonder why. There can be a few reasons to it. The life in Mumbai has been the one that I have created for myself. Every brick in the wall chosen by me. Every color in the dream filled by me. This has been my life. But then again I might be just getting old and interia seems to be taking effect.
On the other hand movement has become a part of modern life. It’s part of survival. Better pay, better job, hope of better future. As I said, it has not been easy but not been entirely tough. Globalization helps. New office doesn’t seem like new. New place doesn’t seem like new. Offices are clones of each other. Cities are clones of each other. Same brands, same shopping places, same eating joints. It doesn’t feel entirely different.
As for me, I am well settled in a week. Got a place to stay, Got my things moved here and am good to go. Modern life has it’s poisons but the good thing is anti-dote is provided beforehand.
Overworked and Underpaid
Most of the time I talk to my colleagues, friends and other working population, One thing seems common; everyone by his/her own admission is overworked and underpaid. Well I too share the feeling and hence it becomes a common cord which helps us empathize.
Come to think of it, if everyone is overworked and if everyone is underpaid, it would be doing wonders for our economy. Imagine working 20 hrs a day for paltry sum, this would for sure create a huge amount of societal wealth and rid us of poverty.
Alas! That’s what I don’t see happening around. Where are things going wrong then? Well my friends, the things are going wrong in the brain and in the heart. Overwork and Underpay is just a facade. There is no such thing in real. In fact it’s a vicious circle.
We always think that if we get more money, we will work harder. Hence most of us keep on changing jobs. But once that pay cheque becomes static too, we start feeling underpaid. The pay cheque remains the same, the work hours remain the same; just that our needs and wishes increase.
The easiest solution for this is become dynamic. Even if the work hours increase, if the rewards are dynamic too, the underpaid feeling will not pitch in. I am not just talking of monetary rewards. It constitutes mental peace and satisfaction too. Most of us who feel over and under are stuck with something we don’t really get drive from. It’s just a daily chore we need to perform.
After a while when our heart is not in it, it becomes unbearable. Whatever amount of money will not satisfy us. There will be a shallow feeling of being used and abused. Used and abused by the society and the system at large.
So work where your heart is. Short term you may earn some money elsewhere but believe me no point making your life a hell in the long run. Instead, you my friend have hell of a life to enjoy!
Simply Insane
The last time I went for a long holiday was long-long ago. To be true, I am not a holiday kind of a person in the normal sense. For me holidays do not mean going on vacation, living out of suitcase, hopping from one tourist location to another. For me holidays are all about chillaxing. There have been times when I have taken couple of days off and slept right through. For me it’s all about brain reboot.
After a long time, I seem to have this craving to put myself to sleep mode. The late mornings, the lethargic afternoons, popcorns, refreshing old seasons of fav shows, lots of writing. And the best of all, lying on the bed, just staring up to the ceiling fan. The feeling of nothing. The absolute zero of chaos. Admittedly juvenile, but my secret to rejuvenation.
There is no single way to handle the worries of life. Some takes them head on, some run away from them. I practice a mix of both. Running away for a while eggs me to take them on. Sometimes the cure is not with the medicines but without them.
I have had some crazy hours to my name. 75hrs without sleep, 32hrs of nonstop sleep, 76hrs without eating. All these date back to the college days. I don’t have luxury to insanity no more. But believe me, it’s the insanity that takes to where we aspire, makes us who we want to. I will be travelling this weekend but I have promised myself some not as insane rest soon.
iPhone 5: A mystic affair
The hype and frenzy every time a new iPhone is launched, seem to be a mystic affair. The zeal surpasses the age groups, the income groups and the continents. What is it that creates this craziness? Is it the new technology? Is it the media built-up? Is it the status symbol?
To a large extent it can be attributed to the herd mentality. “I want it coz if I don’t I won’t be cool”. But that herd comes in later. What drives the early buyers? And it’s not just limited to the buyers. Even the people who can’t afford it are ever more interested. Why so?
We can try and find an analogy in “Who wants to be a millionaire” TV show. What has the TV viewers got to win? Nothing! Still millions sit in front of their TV sets to witness someone else becoming millionaire.
The answer lies in human psychology of “Collective Ownership”. When a new iPhone is launched, it’s not Apple who owns it. The people own it. It is their own. And here is where publicity comes in. Company like Apple would never publicize it as a product by Apple rather it would be an “Apple iPhone”.
Another thing can be the story behind the invention. Would gravity be equally amazing without the back story of the apple that fell? The mysticism surrounding Jobs has flown down to his coveted baby. Do we hear any such story behind say Lumia or Galaxy? No, all we see is a product. But with iPhone it’s much more.
The other reason lies in the legacy. People loved iPhone coz of the technological advancements Jobs envisaged and brought to life. Similar was the case with a 4.8inch android phone recently. It was something novel. People thronged for it. Give the people something innovative and having high standards and they will make you a billionaire.
It won’t be long when people will ditch iPhone. Yes, we are that cruel. We are just waiting for the next messiah. Till then revel Apple in the limelight, as much as you can.
Scared Humans
We humans are such afraid beings. We are afraid of sun, we are afraid of moon, we are afraid of rain, we are afraid of pain. In fact, one does not come to know how scared one is without experiencing it firsthand.
Last month I was facing acute pain in my right eye, right side of nose and right side in the mouth. I keep ignoring it as usual and allaying myself with pain killers. The regular excuses of “No time” and “It will be alright”.
One fine day, I was having lunch with a colleague of mine. I shared about this pain. He looked at me and bam, “Dude, you might have Bell’s Palsy”. I couldn’t properly understand the word at first. Quizzically, I looked towards him. He took out his cell phone and googled and explained it to me. It’s facial paralysis. He went on and on and one.
With his each passing explanation, I began to shudder. How long has the pain been? Is it only on one side or the whole face? Can you pinch your cheek to see if you feel anything? I was white with fear. All my excuses and machoness took a hike. I immediately called up the hospital nearby and took and appointment with a dentist and an ophthalmologist.
Fortunately it was just dryness in the eye, sore nose and sensitivity in the teeth. All three separate problems pounding at once causing a smokescreen of terror.
Anyway, the point is humans can be scared the easiest because we let our psyche get attached.
Friendship Day. Really?
Just got a call from a long time friend. “Hey pal. How r u?”, asked he. “I’m fine”, said I. “Just called to wish you friendship day”. And we both laughed to tears for next 30 secs or so. A day for friendship. Who are we Colonists? Ok, bad joke.
Friendship is the essence of humanity. Why is there a need to put a day for it? Ok…let me try and go with it a bit. It’s friendship day, today. What am I supposed to do? Call up my friends? Greet them? Shouldn’t I be had been doing it regularly if they are my friends?
Historically such days were declared to celebrate some achievement. Independence Day, Republic Day etc. What I feel is sometime down the line, it became a fashion to declare days just for the sake of it. I mean friendship day? Who are we Invaders? Again, bad joke.
In college I understand, it gives a shot at maaroing chance. What after that? Also with declaring days with increasing frequency, it’s not far when we will be marking more than one thing on a single day. Imagine Friendship Day and Animosity Day falling together. That would be hilarious, now wouldn’t it?
To me it seems yet another capitalistic agenda to mint money. Friendship band, cards, gifts, tv, movie and what not. That’s genius by the way. Respect.
With the scale getting larger year by year, not long before I get mutated too. Who knows my friend, you will get a card from me next year.
Anna you betrayed us
Amidst the chant of “Bharat Mata ki Jai”, the atmosphere was all charged up. Patriotism was in vogue again. A huge crowd had gathered at the ground while million more stuck to their TV screens. All were living a force-fed dream. A dream of corruption free India. A dream that we can make a difference. A dream that we do matter.
We saw rebirth of a frail, thin leader. A fighter without arms. Not the demand for food, but the refusal of it shook the very foundations of the legislative of the biggest democracy of the world. We all stood in unison, we did what he said, and we followed wherever led.
As the days passed. One…Two…Three, the pressure started mounting. The health started deteriorating. People were anxious, government was worried. Not for his health but for the backlash, if something happened. More so coz the ideology of party in power was based on fast-unto-death. There seemed no way out.
Some back room negotiations ensued. A tainted ex-CM from financial capital was rushed to Delhi. Anna you agreed. Having been betrayed by Govt., time and again, you still acceded to the letter and promises as if you were just waiting to pounce upon. It’s tough for me to say, but Anna it would have been better if you had withered sitting on the fast. Alas! somewhere down the line, your fast-unto-death became wolf cries.
The corrupt politicians unclothed you in front of public. The cheer-haran was painful. I ask Why? Why did you fool us into disbelief if you were not ready to go the distance? I know it’s tough to give one’s life and I for one cannot. But why did you make false promises?
Your movement is in tatters. Our belief stands shaken. You sided with the limelight hungry, self proclaimed Guru to get the zing back into your campaign, but I am scared now. Scared to be betrayed again. Scared that I will be left again in the midst to fend myself off.
It would be tough for me to believe in another Anna. So long Hazare!
No Country for Emotional Men
“Real Men do cry”. This has almost become a modern cliché. Of the past, men were considered to be this hunk, who were strong physically and emotionally. They seldom broke down, could take right decisions even in traversity and could carry the family on their shoulders. Of late this perception has changed. Emotional sides of men have come to the fore. They do cry, they do break, they do are humans.
How does our society behave with these mortal beings? How does the emotional men treated? Well not quite well to be frank.
What I have observed is, however we may evolve, however we say its fine for men to be emotional, the truth is ‘emotions’ and ‘show of it’ is considered by and large a weakness. On your face nobody would say anything, but you would be mocked behind your backs and the worst part is, at the next opportune moment, you would be ripped off and your emotions en-cashed.
Not only people who don’t matter to you, but also the people who matter to you a lot, your friends and family, will chance upon. Might not be music to your ears but it’s true.
How many times have we seen parents trying ‘emotional blackmail’ just because they know their ward is an emotional fool? How many times did your girl fake cried just because she knows you will break? How many time a colleague told an emotional story just to get some money out of you? It’s all a big hoax.
The thing is, there is no place for emotions in this cruel-cruel world. None outside, None inside. Especially, if you are men. My tip would be to keep to yourself, not let anyone in your emotional side. Not unless you want to be short changed.
People will try to make a fool out of you, just because they can. No other reason.
Ek Main Aur Ek Tu: Seriously!
Recently I saw Ek Main Aur Ek Tu (EMAET) featuring Imran (Rahul) and Kareena (Riana). It was tad slow but a good time pass. The movie was meandering towards an expected finale when the director decided to surprise us. Under the pretext of mature ending, Rahul and Riana decided to be Just Friends.
I couldn’t help but LOL literally. How do people let themselves be manipulated like this? Rahul was happy with his life at the end. He was fine with continuing his friendship in the hope of she agreeing to marriage someday. I have serious issues with people who use this Just Friends after egging the other person on. I have further issues with guys/girls who let themselves into this honey trap.
What I hate is Friendship being insulted, which for me is one of the most sacred relationships. If it’s Friendship, it should not be affected by gender. Right? A friend can be a guy or a girl; one should have similar dedication and feeling towards him/her if they are just friends. Agreed? However most of the people never stick to it. The least they can do is be honest about it.
“He took me out for dinner to Taj last night. He is just a friend of mine”. Huh! First of all there are no free lunches dear. Would he have taken a male friend of his to an equally lavish dinner at Taj? Everyone knows the answer. Stop justifying and just admit that you too were leading on.
In EMAET, Rahul is highly ignorant, or we can say he is too blind in love. He is happy at that very moment coz the girl he loves is there to give him company and he hopes that she will marry him someday. What he doesn’t understand is that Riana has specifically explained her position of being Just Friends. Hence she has no commitment and she needs to give no reason for the break-up. What would happen if one day Riana comes and says, “Hi Rahul meet my boyfriend James”. She would have committed no sin, after all she had already told him that they are nothing more than friends and that’s that.
What would happen to Rahul then? He will be devastated. During a breakup, at least you get to know a reason, you argue, fight and split. Here it’s simple plain stupidity. He won’t even be able to ask Why? This is what happens when a guy who has never been in a relationship gets smitten by a girl who has been in string of relationships and vice-versa. To top of it, throw in Just Friends and you being blind in love try to live in the moment and accept it.
It was one of the silliest ending I could have imagined. In real life, guys like Rahul deserve all the pain and agony they face, coz they are that stupid. He should have moved on when he had a fight. If he decided to be just friend, he should have quashed all hopes of the marriage, started afresh.
Anyways for me the ending turned out to be fun and I had a good days’ laugh. Also it gave me a topic to write about.
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